Thursday, March 08, 2007

I Ain’t No Ways Tired

… Even so, like the Houston Chronicle’s San Antonio-based columnist, Rick Casey, we feel the need to recharge our lagging batteries (solar-powered, natch) and thus will be taking a sabbatical for the next week (we’ll actually be on Spring Break, but “sabbatical” sounds like a much more serious endeavor befitting a man of our station).

Like Casey, we initially planned to “read, write and relflect" during our down time (and we were going to throw in some other ‘R’s for further alliteration: rootin’, rollickin’, rockin’, etc.) but on second thought we decided to hang homeside with our No. 1 manservant, Hidalgo “Huevos” Hidalgo, at the previously twice-foreclosed-upon, 4,000-square-foot townhome in Bellaire, Texas that he was able to purchase through the twin miracles of subprime lending and the half-dozen or so credit cards he has acquired through Bank of America and other major lending institutions (“¿Cómo se dice ‘Ditech’ en español?” he recently asked us).

Good fortune continues to shine on Sr. Hidalgo since he returned to our employ after a brief stint as a copy editor at the Chronicle: He tells us of the recent email notifying him that he is the sole winner of the Irish National Lottery, and sometime next week he expects to claim his share of a fortune left in a Lagos hotel vault by a deceased Nigerian colonel. This “expectation of future earnings” has provided HH with the necessary credit to purchase the largest-screen TV in existence---placement of which in his sprawling “rec room” necessitated the dismantling of two walls in his new townhome---not to mention the wherewithal to import 11 more relatives and near-relatives from his hometown. (He assures us there’s plenty more floor space after the current 17 occupants settle down for the night.)

We have big plans for Spring Break: Hidalgo promises to show us his extensive DVD collection of the exploits of a wrestler named Rey Mysterio, while we hope to return the favor by treating him to the entire cinematic oeuvre of Elvis, starting of course with Love Me Tender and winding up many hours later with Change of Habit.

"You say Mary Tyler Moore plays a nun? Dang!” exclaimed Hidalgo, a semi-lapsed Catholic.

Assuming we have no unfortunate brush with the law or get drunk and accidentally pick up Ann Coulter in a darkened pub, we plan to de-sabbaticalize our self on March 18 or thereabouts.

1 comment:

Phlip said...

Rey Misterio is a good lookin' hombre and does some impressive stunts off the top rope in the ring.